so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
Who breaks their ankle the day before a beach wedding? This guy. Maybe this is karma for fucking someone's wife? Idk.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Randomize