my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
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