So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
I did not marry a roomba.
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