why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
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