even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize
