Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
Randomize
