oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
Randomize
