Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize
