i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
never play flip cup with pint glasses
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Randomize
