I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
