yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
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