There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
I feel like a drive thru vagina
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
Randomize
