Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
Randomize
