Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
