sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Randomize
