just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
Randomize
