its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
