how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
