What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
