What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
Accidentally peeing a little on the couch in the middle of a sneeze is way different from railing a random on our waffle counter. I am the better roommate.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Randomize
