You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
Randomize
