I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
Randomize
