About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
Randomize
