Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
I have already put on my inside pants.
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize
