where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
Randomize
