Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
