I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
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