my being single is dangerous.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
Randomize
