I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Randomize
