this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
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