4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
Randomize
