every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
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