omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
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