She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
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