Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
Randomize
