Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
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