i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
Are we still banned from the library?
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Randomize
