Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
Randomize