Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
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