i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
Randomize
