i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
Randomize
