no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
only you would photoshop your dick
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
