Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
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