Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
Randomize