ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
Randomize
