how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
I'm always down for nudity.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
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