You work out of a Hotel?
he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
Randomize
