No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
Randomize
