Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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