your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
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